I can’t do it.
I still have not brought myself to drive down Rangeline.
I know in a way it will be closer for me…but also, I know I will break down in tears. I’ve seen the pictures, I’ve watched the videos…I’ve talked to the people and heard their tears.
Horrific stories from people. Horrific.
The best fiction/tv/movie writers couldn’t even begin to imagine…
Amazing, Brave, Hopeful stories from people.
That make me want to cry as well.
Dorothy had it right…
There is No place like home.
I’ll start from the beginning…
Sunday felt like any other sunday… I overslept like usual and missed church, so i went back to sleep and woke up after noon… I didn’t have to work until 5, so I got on my computer and checked facebook for the first time in a week and watched a movie… I got ready and headed to work around 4:30, like usual…
I remember as I drove down V highway from Diamond to Hwy 249 to go to Joplin looking out at the fields and seeing the Humidity in the air… it just hung there, I even tweeted, “It’s so humid it looks like fog.” And it was humid.
As I got closer to Joplin, the clouds started rolling in…but I had no clue about the weather, I was just listening to my CD player as usual… I pulled into the Webb City Wal-Mart parking lot right at 5, right as it started to rain…
After I clocked in, I was put on reg. 2…right by the front Grocery Door…where i could watch everything… and we were BUSY! we had lines and people were just trying to get home… before i got on register, Brandi needed some help with something… and i had to order change since the previous cashier left me with no money and no receipt tape and no indication i was out of either… finally i got my register going and we started to slow down a bit… and then we heard the sirens…
…and I looked over to see if Korey or Nick or someone was there to call the Code Black… but no one did… and I asked the door greeters said they said to wait over the walkie… by this time the sirens had stopped… people were trying to just get home at this point… then the hail.
i thought the roof was coming down… in my 6+ years, i had never been in a code black until this month…and i had NEVER heard hail like that…ever.
it was between quarter and golf ball size… and it just kept coming… then, they called the code black.
we all had to go to the back of the store… I helped usher people back and do the sweep…and at this point, i wasn’t too worried… I love storms, well, I loved storms, past tense.
we were back there for probably 30-45 min. they called it around 5:40-5:45pm, i saw a picture of the tornado on someone’s phone, but you couldn’t tell where it was… it didn’t seem real… we went back to work… I rang up some friends, one had her sister with her, still in her graduation gown…they had just come from Joplin’s graduation minutes before the Code Black…about the time we got the all clear, we also started hearing the rumors…
“Academy is gone.” “IHOP is gone.” “15th (WM) lost the roof.” “St.John’s was hit and is on fire.” “someone said there are people clawing their way out of what used to be pizza hut.”
but it still didn’t feel real.
I immediately sent a text to my family, to all my friends in joplin (who’s numbers i had in my current phone, who hadn’t posted online yet)…no one could get a call out, texting was all that worked, and it was spotty…that’s when the panic started…
people were frantic trying to make calls, when the all clear for the 2nd code black was called around 6:55pm, people bolted to check on loved ones… I texted my dad who doesn’t know how to text because i couldn’t call him. My mom responded and was already at the hospital in Carthage…it was already crazy… she couldn’t find my brother…he was on his way to joplin last she’d talked to him, before the tornado… i was on break, but couldn’t eat…i hadn’t eaten all day… i almost lost it… then an amazing little buzz… one of the happiest sounds i’ve ever heard… he was ok, he was on his way to check on our grandparents since we hadn’t heard from them either… my immediate family was ok. I knew one grandparent was ok…and soon would know of the others… and my adrenaline was pumping… and i couldn’t do anything.
i was at work…we suddenly had no customers… half the associates had left… the rest were on their phones…
7:30- possibly the longest passing of time ever…
one of the cashiers’ son walked in, and she lost it… she hadn’t been able to get ahold of him…she’d thought he was at work…at the 15th street wal-mart… i checked out her customers with my ice cream cone in my hand as she cried tears of joy and the customers thanked the Lord that he was safe.
8:00(ish)- the people started coming in then… buying socks, underwear, soap, tarps, water, crowbars, gloves, bandages, flashlights, etc…things to start the searching.
and we gradually got busier and busier…and busier…
I was supposed to get off work at 10pm…
…I got locked out of the system around 11pm. took a 45min lunch, cried in my car, and came back til almost 2am.
10:00pm(ish)- I was working register 15, our “smokeshop” aisle…our “10 items or less” aisle… people were getting things to help people, to cover the holes in their roofs, to bandage the injured and clothe their children, and this woman comes into my lane with an electric cart, an over flowing regular cart and her 2 kids…she’s a “regular”… not from Joplin. the following is essentially what happened:
“Why are you guys so busy?!” -Woman
“because the 15th street store is gone…and everyone’s coming here…” -me
“what?” -woman
“there’s no more 15th street walmart.” – me
“why?” – woman
“because a tornado just took it and half of joplin out.” – me (as everyone in line gets more disgusted and pissed off)
“is that what all the sirens were going off for?” -woman
“yes.” -me (i was royally irritated at this point because the woman was sitting here, barking orders at the girl, maybe 11yrs old, and arguing with the boy, 8yrs-ish, over gum. and they were taking forever…)
i scanned the boys gum and put it in a bag…
“can i have that out?” – boy
“You. Can. Wait.” – me (i’m normally not rude but i was pissed. and the boy turned the carousel with my hand in the bad and took his gum and turned it back and walked off…)
i felt so bad for everyone else who had to wait on this woman. terrible. she didn’t even flinch when i told her about joplin… bitch.
Sam and Brandi came in for a few hours even though they’d worked earlier, and had to work later that day also… a few others worked late also…
we were slammed.
I saw the pictures online. still didn’t feel real.
I watched the footage on tv. still didn’t feel real.
—[written 4:00am- 28 May 2011]—
…and now, 3 months later, it still doesn’t feel real.
there are still so much emptiness in the disaster zone… most places its just flat bits of concrete foundation where people used to live.
we are still busy at walmart… the new 15th street walmart should be open in early november… just in time for christmas… the building is up, there’s even lights on inside.
The walgreens is opening next week.
so is chick-fil-a.
and home depot is coming along… as are many other places.
The high school is having jrs & srs classes in the mall. soph & fresh are at the old memorial high school. Franklin Tech is at another building near main st. they’ve managed to start school on time.
There are hundreds of FEMA trailers across from the airport…and another hundred-ish on fountain rd in webb/airport drive… they got wells and electricity for them all set up in a little over a month, with temperatures of 105 degrees everyday.
It’s amazing to see. neighbor helping neighbor. strangers helping strangers. people from around the world sending prayers and support.
but it’s still so hard to believe that the tornado actually happened.
it still feels like a dream. like joplin is still the old joplin.
you get a craving for ihop’s crepes and think, “oh maybe we’ll go after work…” then you remember its gone. or you are driving across town and drive down rangeline or main or any of the others, and you can see across town…
…and it hits you like a brick wall.
you can be standing in front of what used to be ___ and it still feels like your imagination.
its eery. but its getting better.
people still freak out when it so much as rains, but we’re slowly becoming less scared. not forgetful or negligent about storm safety, just less scared… but i think we’ll all be a little scared forever.
but we have hope.
lots of it.
and we have love.
and we are rebuilding. we are going on with life, not “normal” by any means, but we are slowly getting back to life.
we will heal. we’ll have scars, but scars fade. we won’t forget by any means. joplin won’t be the same, but it will be better than before.
keep praying. and pray for those in Hurricane Irene’s path. and those affected by the earthquakes last tuesday.
and keep loving each other. you never know what will happen, and you never know when your time is up. so love love love.
and always, Carpe Diem.
…lata days
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